I been given another 4 day MC... before by Dr Thazin as i was a bit asthmatic... two days rest and then when i tot i was well... i went a bit jogging... it was ok... but i didnt know... came back.., feel feverish, cold n flu... damn... so contact a fren... and given MC for 4 days... and today the whole day i was... like resting... i know i put something on my fb i wasnt thinking straight... well just for me to know... well like i say my blog is where i pour my heart... let me write here... wat happened... today went to RIPAS... to get my med n the cert... i dropped by to frwd to my kerani... but i didnt go up... fYI, my unit do have some disciplinary problem with attendance and all... but i knw we trying our best to perform here... anyhow... like always got ppl called n asked n complaint as no one around.. and well i m on MC... wat to expect... anyhow... i did ask my kerani..ada M ada keja... and she hesitated and after a while said.. "nda" ... i m like why hesitated... if out ke apa... could tell me terus wat... i wasnt satisfied... so i called H... n to be informed... "At bank.." and when i ask where M... H said... "oh ya with Me.."... and H said "Talk to u later... ask Kerani"... I was like... ya i just asked Kerani... and all she said "Nada"... wat the hell... and like... when i msg other satff... "Where"... got replied.. "Oh At computer room"... of course... i am like... the office is small... n yet asked 3 ppl 3 different answers! of course i smelled fish! one 'Nda', one kata "d bank" and one said "computer room"... when i replied back n said...weird... n said i just asked H said H with M at bank... and Kerani said "Nda"... and guess wat... the staff took about 11mins to reply... despite that the computer room is just next room.. to check wont even take 1 minute... i was fed up as no matter how hard i tried to make things better... do this rule.. make attendance...log book.... n still i cant believe ppl dont behave... and then when u tegur sikit ppl sound so offensive... its like dont ppl realise they make mistake... i knw i may not be a good head... but i m trying here... i am new... iatah wheni feel down like tis, i tot i asked opinion ke apa ke... but i dont knw why i dnt get reassurance and any assistance i need... walhal if it happened to others and they ask me i would enlightened them... bukan apa i tot two heads better than one... and like mayb i am not well i wont be thinking straight... but like i dont knw why... ppl keep looking at one flaw... u do many good n one mistake... ppl knw the mistake... i mean like M... i knw M made mistakes..a lot... but from my observation now... M is trying to make thing better... i knw not great but i salute the effort... and like i know many complaints... but most revert to M eventually... i feel sorry at times.. that ppl dont give chance if u made mistake...but i do knw at times... i m too soft.. but today i knw they something fishy... i mean even yesterday... someone told me seeing M's car at home afternoon time office hours... wat wonder me at times... ppl tip me wit tis info... wat the aim...i knw some for good... but always the bad thing saja... at times i knw my staffs dont take me serious.. they dont knw... ppl relay msg to me... even last time.... i was on leave... to the point when they referred patients to our clinic... i will know... i knw they call my clinic... n yet also they will sms me to inform me of the referrals... which was good lang as i keep track... as last time... it was good that i knw... as last time ya... if i didnt ask... no one would inform me abt the patient... and my kerani didnt write the referrals in our referral books despite kena called and my staff did see the patient. hard ya,... you may wonder why ineed to knw... i m the only clinical psych on ripas... so all patients i must knw so i can supervise them and if something not right,... i will be liable and being held responsible... thats why... none is licensed to practice aprt from me.. do i sound arrogant? i hope not but the truth... i knw i been complaining lately... i knw tis is reality... just that i feel i cant be at ease... mc ke leave ke always ada kena tfun... so today i actually off my phone.. i need rest.. am not well.... anyhow... i better get back to sleep now... til later! i hope ppl dont take it wrong... i do blogging to pour my heart out (like a diary) but i mean no harm... its like family... u get angry, argue but doesnt mean u r enemy ya... as you love each other thats why got conflict and all... as we need to adjust n compromise and also learn to knw each other...