Hi,
I know I have not been writing for a long time. Things are just pretty much the same. Love life is the same… adjusting to being in relationship.  and well I went to HK early November… and it was fun. And just recently I did help in SO. It was good to be helping but now I know why I left before. Just the people to be working with. I can’t stand them. Just put my nawaitu to help and put everything else aside. And well seriously I don’t think I want to be involved more in future unless things change in there. Just *&^% really!
And well… things at work is the same. Pretty much occupied and seriously at times I lost my direction. Not focus with all the projects of this and that. I wonder why when I was in UK or OZ… when u r a clinician… u r a clinician… and lest other things. Not to say u won’t do anything else but all are related and beneficial. But here is like endless and fruitless. You be part of something that you r not good at… and of course the outcome is suck.
And seriously I am very frustrated with certain attitudes of people. Think they would get away with anything. The good one will be used fully and no one will look at you. And for once I am saying here I hate being the head! I know it came with a price but like if talking about I am not a good leader or delegating… I think I am but like I think I have bad followers. Not motivated and not very incentive. And once I said a thing would pull a face and sour face! Lest I said what happened with the one before… who did all the damage. And now another one. I been nice… seriously….
I am tired being the nice one… and at the end… still I m not good. And like how can I help when you are not helping urself. I know I am bad saying this… do reflect of all ppl… why everyone progress and only you cant and still stuck… we help a lot… but at the end of the day you are not helping yourself!
Giving up whenever I said something… I am fed up being asked n query by the ppl up there… and since this is a matter that involved you, of course I need the cooperation. Wat? being the head do I have to be in charge of all…. Meaning I know it all… as I m superior! HELLO… THIS IS YOUR FUCKING MATTER!! And despite I have the qualification… not all I learn from uni… learn it from experience ppl!!!
Sorry ppl… I know I should not vent it out but at times just too much! Seriously I can just shut my eyes n do nothing….. and well.. for certain times… I feel like stepping down…. But who else can take this job!
And yes… I know I wont just be like this…. I have plan…. Just time will tell…. I m just fed up and fed up!!