Sunday, December 29, 2013

I seldom have a resolution when it comes to new year... but this year I want to make one.... My resolution is to Be happy!! And for you for saying harsh words and said that I should just die with my friend.... Here from us! Enjoy!

One of the last messages you sent was that you asked me to define friend or love one? That when you asked to choose between a friend and you. Yes you were my loved on... I used were as we over now... although I must say I still love you. We been together for almost 2 years, it is not easy for me as you think but I know this is for the best. While you were in KL... we had the best time of our life... but I don't know why eversince you are back to Brunei things changed drastically. I lost you... you became an angry person... I tried being there and accept whatever but you dumped me again and again. Labelled with harsh words and many.... I took all and still willing to stay by your side. Many times you said you no longer wanted our relationship when I asked and still I stayed by your side. I got confused as one day I am your loved on and another day I am a stranger.
And when lately I managed to get myself a friend.... a friend... I am much happier and I can be myself. I can talk and tell anything. And I even told you about this friend. And as you did not even want to meet me again... I spent time with my friend. And you know the story. Yes almost each day we spent time together as I feel more real. We do mutual activities this and that... and with you all we had was phone call, wassap and yes phone calls..... what real in that?! You said you are afraid to see me.... and prefer this way after KL.... And yes you killed my feeling.... from time to time....
I just don't know what to say and u asked me friend or love one... for this case I stick with my friend.... as I don't feel u and I are lovers in a real sense!
As can be seen from these pictures... we been eating a LOT!! These are just some of the pictures!

It is funny how when I think back... I lost AR as I have new friend in my life. AR never even want to meet me... do mutual things as couple or anything.... and yes... i was asked to choose.... fren or lover? and I chose my fren.... :)
About few month back... I met a friend. And yes it is nice after been a while to have a friend. But I do know I cant hope too much. People changed and when time past all will change but for now I am happy having him as a friend to talk to. And hang out....

It has been a while I wrote in here. Last was like March 2013. Just this year has been hard and I didn't get to go to a lot of place. Mainly work... and I was stuck with AR... and we went downhill and yes just two days ago I think that was our end for good. Maybe it is for the better. Life been lonely and so shit I must say but work is my life mainly. Sigh.... loneliness is like my middle name. At times I wish people can be more appreciative of me. I do good to them but what do I need in return. I am like a nobody and never a priority and having an impact to them. Nothing!
Anyhow till later. I am hoping that I will write more.